All it took was one Reddit user to talk about it for someone to actually design and market the poop knife to help people break their poop down.
Pooping habits aren't exactly a topic that can be slid into normal conversation, at least not without everyone possibly looking at you with disgust or apprehension. But it must be done because how else would you know that such a product called the "poop knife" exists and that more families have it than you might realize?
Designed to help people who poop "big" break their shit down (literally), the product is one-of-a-kind. "Never to be mistaken for a box opener again 📦, this poop knife is one of a kind is made from metal-reinforced silicone it is strong, hygienic, and easy to clean. 💦* Guaranteed not to turn into a rusty punji stick. Be a samurai of the porcelain poo poo platter," goes the website of the product designer, Original Poop Knife.
If you're wondering how this "poop knife" even came into existence, here's the inspiration. On Reddit, a user by the name of LearnedButt made a confession saying, "I was 22 years old when I learned that not every family has a poop knife. My family poops big. Our family had a poop knife. It was an old rusty kitchen knife that hung on a nail in the laundry room, only to be used for that purpose. It was normal to walk through the hallway and have someone call out ‘Hey, can you get me the poop knife?' I thought it was standard kit. You have your plunger, your toilet brush, and your poop knife."
And of course, the comments that came after will leave you in splits. One user shared their experience, "old rusty kitchen knife. Let's be honest here. That ain't rust." Another said, "I was literally SO happy to find this thread. No lie. I thought it was just me (and my one brother). We had to take 'kondramol' (sp) as kids, and as an adult I've stopped up toilets from NY to Florida when I was without the 'cutter.' We used to have a coat hanger hanging from the shower rod (makes me gag to think about it now), which we used to cut the poop."
However, it was one comment that took the cake, or in this case, took the s***. The user wrote, "My friends sister laid a huge turd in the toilet. She couldn’t get it to flush. So she just casually strolls into kitchen while me and my buddy are watching Friday night videos, and grabs a pocket knife from the junk drawer. Goes back towards the bathroom, my buddy is hey what the eff you need a knife for? So she says the toilet won’t flush. Their dad hears this jumps up and runs down to bathroom and screams who the shit this turd. Which brings mom into the bathroom she freaks out."
Continuing, the user said, "No all 5 of us are in the throne room in admiration of her magnificent turd. The dad asks what is the knife for and his sister goes it’s what I use to cut them. Yeah that’s what she said. It was silent until her mom asked how long have you been cutting turds with that knife, I am dying my friend is in tears, well since we are all here I guess the secret is out so I get massive turds on my period mom. So for about six years mom. She goes to leave and her dad grabs her and says cut the cheese sweet pea and that’s your knife now. That’s it I can’t breathe I am laughing so hard. She is in tears her mom is mortified and her dad was trying to be supportive, my buddy and I are being total jack*****."
"Her dad pulls us aside and threatened to kick the sh** out us if a word of sir turdly of bummertown gets out of the house. We never said a word about it outside of their house but we were brutal to here at home," they added.
So it looks like it's not as uncommon as you might have thought when you started reading this. While there are many who probably don't utilize a DIY poop knife, there are plenty who do. And if you are part of the latter category, maybe it's best to avoid using the ones available around the house and get yourself an original poop knife. After all, it could be a disaster if it were to fall in the wrong hands.
Cover image source: Facebook | Original Poop Knife