One kiss can open doors to a whole new world of information about your relationship.
A kiss can speak volumes. Whether it's a good kiss, a bad kiss, or one that makes you weak in the knees, it says something. And the study, A Kiss Is Still A Kiss -- Or Is It?, conducted by psychologists at the State University of New York at Albany, agrees. According to the research, 59 percent of men and 66 percent of women claim they avoided getting into a relationship because of a bad kiss. This comes as no surprise since it is more than just a part of physical intimacy. A kiss evokes emotions that can reveal a lot of things about your partner, no matter how hard they try to hide it.
"Kissing is part of an evolved courtship ritual," said Gordon G. Gallup, Jr, a researcher of the study. "When two people kiss there is a rich and complicated exchange of information involving chemical, tactile, and postural cues."
With kissing being such an integral part of communication, here are four things that you can learn about your man from the way he kisses you.
Or maybe if he is any good at all. "Male saliva contains measurable amounts of the sex hormone testosterone which can affect libido," says the study. This means that you might be aroused by kissing your partner but it begs the question - does it give you satisfaction? Of course, you won't be able to tell if someone is good in bed until you get in with them but these little hints from the kissing can be your trailer. And pay attention to their tiny movements when they touch you or hold you. You'll be able to tell if there's any passion in it.
Anita A. Chlipala, a licensed marriage and family therapist, from Relationship Reality 312, Inc., told Verily Mag, “Someone who wants to keep kissing you is obviously enjoying the kissing and feels some chemistry." Is that what you have with him? Chemistry doesn't just exist within the boundaries of kissing, it's the connection felt between two people that can also be non-verbal. You know you share good chemistry with someone when you feel comfortable opening up to each other. He could be a bad kisser but you might still have great chemistry with him.
There's nothing more attractive in a person than confidence. A shaky or unsure kiss isn't always a bad sign but understanding the confidence with which he plants one on you could reveal just how much he cares about the relationship. If he is nervous and is unable to share his emotions, it could mean that he is holding back. In a healthy relationship, a kiss shared with confidence can bring two people closer, something that will help during the rough patches, reminding you why you're with each other. Additionally, if there is a twinkle in his eye or he gets excited to see you, it could indicate that he appreciates you and knows that you're worth it.
“We are taught that we should always follow our feelings and do whatever makes us happy. But feelings are very fickle and fleeting. Real love, on the other hand, is like the North Star in the storms of life; it is constant, sure, and true. Whenever we’re lost and confused, we can find strength in the love that we have chosen,” Your Life Isn't For You author Seth Aaron Smith wrote for HuffPost. Your man's kiss could show you a lot about how committed he is to you and the relationship or whether he sees it as finite.
"If you get a tongue in your ear and a hand creeping up your shirt, it maybe he’s trying to rush or is just interested in scoring. Wait for another real date (not just hanging out), and see if he’s consistently in contact with you—not just texting you last minute, asking if you’re available to meet up,” Anita A. Chlipala suggested.
Every kiss is different and in the heat of the moment, we could miss out on critical signs that it shows us. Don't ignore it. Let the kiss speak to your mind as much as it may speak to your heart. Let it tell you the things about your partner that they may not always be able to express. It could help you understand where you stand in the relationship.